I thought I wasn't going to
Never again i said
But now
All I can think is how badly I want to

I want to feel it rip and tear
I want the blood to spill and drip
I want the scars

I just don't understand I'm happy
Things are going well compaired to what I'm use to
But all I want is to bleed
Maybe this is the start to my cycle
Maybe I shouldn't
But I don't know if I can avoid it anymore